One of the most popular outings other than eating out at restaurants in Cairo would be the cinema. If our eyes aren’t glued to the television you will find us at the cinema. Egyptians love watching the latest Hollywood Block Busters and Arabic Box Office hits.
Going to the cinema most of the time can be a pleasant break where you don’t have to think about work, the kids and other day-to-day dilemmas and stress. It gives you a chance to zone out and just focus on the surround sound and the images that flash before your eyes on the big screen, now a days that isn’t always the case.
Over the past decade people’s social etiquette and consideration for others seems to have been totally abandoned. There have been a countless number of times where I and many other acquaintances and friends of mine have come out of the theater fuming at how thoughtless and irresponsible some people can be for not switching off their mobile phones, taking the call in the middle of the film and having a loud conversation while others are trying to concentrate and enjoy the movie, also constantly hitting the back of the chair among many other things.
An old friend of mine, brought this issue to light by posting it as his status on face book the day after he had gone to watch a movie and had not enjoyed the experience, due to parents having brought their young children to a late night showing. His status read;
“Can anybody with children please explain to me what the pleasure (for the parents or kids) is, for bringing kids to a drama movie at the cinema from 10:00 pm till after midnight? Because I wonder why children seem not to like it that much… of course, as a single person, what do I know??”
Karim’s status started a flood of comments on his status that a semi debate began.
Some of the responses that he received were the following;
Ahmed wrote; “It is very simple ya karim …the parents want to watch the movie and they have no place to leave the children in .so they are ‘obliged’ to take them welly ye7sal ye7sal :))) (what happens, happens) “
Loutfi wrote; “I experienced the children during a movie from midnight to 2.00 am. In Europe they will not allow the children in at all”
Nancy who is a mother wrote; “I had a big fight in the cinema once because of that and talked to the cinema management, but they treated me as I am the crazy one!”
Mai, a mother of two wrote; “This is totally wrong I don’t agree that kids go to movies with their parents.”
Tamer ‘s response to the debate was; “I think the parents are envying the singles that they still can enjoy their time and go for a movie. It is not only for drama movies but also for those that definitely doesn’t suite children at all, and not only from 10pm, but also @ midnight till 3am where it is not healthy @ all to take children where they should be sleeping……so the parents … doesn’t care about their children neither about their health nor how they raise them as definitely what they will see will affect their character @ that age………one last thing, they don’t even bother themselves to keep them still, but they just loose them like demons in the cinema playing and making hell of noise!”
Aysem’s input was; “Kimo I applaud you! I would have thought EXACTLY the same thing. I think we live in a society where having children is revered to the point that other people’s needs and personal space is overlooked at times. I’ve encountered this in so many situations, I always laugh to myself when I see an army of mothers and babies congregating next to me in a cafe, whilst the offspring wail like hyenas and basically cause a riot, much to the discontent of the other patrons. It’s especially irritating when I’m trying to spend half an hour to myself, reading the paper or a book…Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to sound like a ‘Bah Humbug’ scrooge character, but I think that sometimes, people with children feel that they transcend social confines of what is proper. I.e. there is ‘them’ and ‘everyone else’ and Boo to you, if you don’t accept that. Regarding your cinema experience, I’m sorry, but if it’s past a certain hour, and they can’t find someone to watch them, maybe they should just stay home?!”
I, like Karim am single and I don’t have any children of my own therefore unable to give a reasonable explanation, as a parent but because I am a teacher and I do work with children and a long side parents. I may have the ability to see things from more than one perspective. So, here is my take on the situation.
As an educator I deal with children on a daily basis and in the midst of class discussions, I am often shocked to find that most of the children in my class (7-8yrs) go unchaperoned to the cinema and have also seen movies that I go to watch, which in my opinion is appalling. Films are rated for a reason. The reason being that the material shown is not appropriate for them. I can understand that parent’s want to go to out and enjoy life and not feel imprisoned or bound to their children and want to break in their daily routine. Parenting is one of the most tough stressful and demanding jobs. Therefore understandably they need a couple of hours of release. That is what date nights or girl’s/boy’s nights out are for. So why don’t these parents organize or preplan a day ahead of time so that they can have someone look after their children while they spend quality time with their significant other or with their girlfriends/guy friends.
I am completely opposed to the idea of parents taking little ones to the cinema; they don’t take in to consideration the viewing pleasure of the other cinema patrons who have paid good money to watch the film of their choice. Never mind the poor unfortunate children who are most probably tired, bored, scared and shocked. These parents are being just plain selfish in only wanting to please their own needs and desires. They also don’t think that children at a young age fully comprehend the material that is being shown, WHICH IS PURE DENIAL!!!! Children are more aware and alert than adults and which is proven by the behavior of the younger generation today by their actions and vocabulary they use in the playground and amongst themselves.
Taking children to horror, ROMANTIC or action packed films can lead to nightmares and have them waking up in the middle of the night terrified for days and weeks on end. This surly just adds to parental stress, it can also lead to developing phobias.
For example, my parent’s were very careful of what they permitted my sister and I to watch when we were younger, but my sister some how with out my parents knowing watched the horror movie ‘Jaws’ and twenty years later she is still terrified of swimming in the sea because she has a fear of being attacked by sharks.
Another thing that is totally wrong is keeping young children up past 8 or 9 pm which is extremely unhealthy for their physical and mental development. It is a medical fact that children need at least 8 to 10 hours of sleep every night. As a teacher I have had children fall asleep in class, grouchy and unable to concentrate because they haven’t had a decent nights sleep. The problem is a lot of parent’s are not privy to information about what is and isn’t good for their child’s development and the MAJORITY don’t give a toss anyway. Similarly when going to a restaurant or public place at any time of day and find children are left to their own devices and are tearing through the place like Tasmanian devils. This behavior happens for 3 reasons a) they are bored and need to be kept occupied. (b) Their parent’s haven’t taught them how to behave or corrected their behavior (c) they are craving their parent’s time, affection and attention.
So, the question now is; “What do we do about it?” Do we walk away from these instances, just complain amongst ourselves and throw our hands up in the air in defeat because we doubt no one is going to listen to us or do we be assertive and take some form of action like Nancy did?
Karim’s response to his many posts was ‘I really respect Nancy who talked to the management of the cinema. a friend of mine told me I should do the same yesterday and of course I didn’t, expecting to get a reaction such as the one she got. So, should we stop going to the movies and buy them on DVD or just accept the fact that there is selfishness, no law or consideration for others and get used to having kids around us if we want to go to the cinema?”
Nirvana’s response to Karim’s question was; “Like Nancy, keep talking to the Management and make an issue and maybe they will do something one day; like enforcing some laws.”
Jacqueline added “Be positive, complain to the management, hush the annoying children and parents or anything else that shows your disagreement with what’s happening but never let them lock you at home :) I always hush the others and I always complain though it was useless most of the time but it makes me feel better than just accepting the fact.”
Change never occurs if we sit around and do nothing. If you take a stance, like Nancy did and let your voices be heard and if the management of the movie theaters are flooded with complaints or a boycott takes place, they will be left with no choice and will have to take your complaints seriously and make some changes if they don’t want to lose their paying customers. We could also suggest to the management to have a viewing once week where all children under the age of 18 are not permitted to enter the cinema after 9pm and have it posted at the ticketing desk so that parents know not to bring their children and people like ourselves are assured of a peaceful and stress free night of watching a movie without kids running up and down the isles or wailing and squirming in the their seats.
I would like to thank Karim for bringing this discussion to life and to all of those who permitted me to quote them.